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1 Jamie: So according to what you're saying, the Loch Ness Monster might not even be in the Loch, or in the water at all?
2 Jamie: It could have been in the heart of Glasgow for all we know!
3 Adam: No, it would have learnt the lesson about straying from the Loch from its run-in with Saint Columba.
4 Jamie: Why, what'd he do?
4 Adam: He headbutted it and told it to shut its geggy and shoot the craw back hame.
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Yeah, okay, Saint Columba was originally Irish, not Glaswegian. But surely after a couple of years spent proselytising to stroppy Scots he would have picked up some of the lingo.
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