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1 {scene: Underground, in the secret dwarven kingdom of Dwergenberg. The party have come across a store of barrels.}
1 Dwalin: Och! Stoores o' dwarven whusky, distulled in the ginuine dwarven fashion, ye ken. Try soom! {translation: Ah! Stores of dwarven whisky, distilled in the genuine dwarven fashion, you know. Try some!}
1 Lambert: Hmmm... unusual.
2 Alvissa: But whisky needs malt and barley. How do you grow those underground?
3 Dwalin: We dinnae. {translation: We don't.}
3 Lambert: So what's it made from?
4 Dwalin: Foongus! {translation: Fungus!}
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Unfortunately fungus whisky isn't a completely original idea. Google revealed to me precisely one other site that mentioned it. Funnily enough, it's a site expanding on dwarven culture in a Dungeons & Dragons campaign setting.
And in recent years this unsightly black fungus has been the focus of attention in some areas because it is starting to affect the homes and business of people located in towns near distilleries. And in Kentucky (where they distil a lot of bourbon whisky), property owners are even taking the distilleries to court for compensation over the fungus.
Wow. Who would have thought that dwarves were responsible for so much trouble?
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