1 Isaac Newton: Hello, Archbishop.
1 Archbishop of Canterbury: Mr Newton, I've come to inquire why you haven't been attending church regularly.
2 Isaac Newton: I'm afraid it just doesn't excite me any more. The Bible stories are old and well known. I yearn to know what happens next!
3 Archbishop of Canterbury: Ah, but my sermons do address later events, and very enthralling they are too.
4 Archbishop of Canterbury: For sequels, mass time's exhilaration!
4 Isaac Newton: Hmmm...

I realise this archbishop looks suspiciously like Pope Pius XI. Just one of those eerie coincidences, I guess.

By the way, England apparently has two Anglican archbishops: the well-known Archbishop of Canterbury, and the less well-known Archbishop of York, who is subordinate to Canterbury. But given that no Archbishops of York seem to have been murdered because they made enemies with King Henry II, nor beheaded, nor burnt alive, nor died of the black plague, nor beheaded again, perhaps York isn't such a bad place to be Archbishop after all.

The background, by the way, is a photo I took at Cambridge University, just outside Trinity College. The tree is an apple tree. It is reputed to be a direct descendant of the apple tree. Yes, the apple tree that discovered gravity.

---

2022-11-13 Rerun commentary: Maybe it's time for England to appoint a few more archbishops. The Archbishop of Tunbridge Wells. The Archbishop of Milton Keynes. The Archbishop of Wookey Hole.