1 {scene: Ishmael's college room}
1 SFX: Knock! Knock!
2 Loren: Why don't you ever call me, Ishmael?
2 Ishmael: Loren!
3 Ishmael: Because you're an evil manipulative witch! A slovenly trull!
4 Loren: You're not getting me mixed up with some ex-girlfriend, are you?
5 Ishmael: No, none of them are actually sadistic killers, you brazen strumpet.
6 Loren: Oh come now. I'm not all that bad. I'm here to warn you about something.
7 Ishmael: What is it, you cheap trollop? You saucy tart! You wanton wench!
8 Loren: Seen your cat lately?
8 Ishmael: Moby Tom!!!

Ishmael's insults come straight from that fantastic source of random descriptions of all sorts of things: from herbs, spices, and medicinal vegetables, to religious articles and furnishings, to harlots. Yes, they are from the infamous random harlot table, found on page 192 of the Advanced Dungeons & Dragons Dungeon Master's Guide (1st edition), herewith reproduced in all its prostitutional glory:

• 01-10 Slovenly trull
• 11-25 Brazen strumpet
• 26-35 Cheap trollop
• 36-50 Typical streetwalker
• 51-65 Saucy tart
• 66-76 Wanton wench
• 77-85 Expensive doxy
• 86-90 Haughty courtesan
• 91-92 Aged madam
• 93-94 Wealthy procuress
• 95-98 Sly pimp
• 99-00 Rich panderer

My mother was never worried about any of those foundless allegations that Dungeons & Dragons led to any sort of satanic behaviour or odd personality disorders, but perhaps it was just as well that she never flipped through the latter pages of the DMG.