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1 Charity Collector Guy: I’ve completed a preliminary audit.
2 Charity Collector Guy: Your books are highly irregular.
2 Head Death: HOW SO?
3 Charity Collector Guy: Well, firstly, they’re written on human skin...
3 Head Death: IT’S MORE FLEXIBLE THAN VELLUM.
4 Charity Collector Guy: ... in blood...
4 Head Death: DO YOU KNOW HOW EXPENSIVE INK IS??
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I really wanted to make the punchline "DO YOU KNOW HOW EXPENSIVE PRINTER INK IS??", but I realised that unfortunately I'd already established that the ledgers were hand-written.
Vellum is a writing material made from calfskin, similar to parchment but of finer quality. It's not made much any more, however Acts of Parliament of the United Kingdom and Acts of the Oireachtas of the Republic of Ireland are still printed on vellum for archival purposes.
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