1 {scene: the pirate ship, in the open ocean}
1 Sailor: {groggily waking up, lying on the deck} Oh, my head... Whu- what happened? Where am I?
2 Sailor: {looking around} I'm on a ship? How did I get here?
3 Wendy: We be slippin' somethin' into ye grog in that bar in Tortuga. Ye be a part o' the crew now!
4 Sailor: Wow. What a slick operation. I'm impressed!

If you don't get it, think about it for a minute.

As an absolute last resort, check here.

I'm glad Andy Weir of Casey & Andy has fevered dreams with puns this bad in them, so bad that he feels compelled to get out of bed and e-mail to me in an effort to soothe his restless slumber.

For more of our collaborative work, check out GURPS Casey & Andy!

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2014-07-12 Rerun commentary: For further information about being impressed, check here.

Also, I mention Tortuga a fair bit in this theme. It's my all-time favourite piratical port town. Tortuga is actually an island off the coast of Haiti, which sheltered multiple settlements of various colonial powers in the 17th century, which meant it was a great place for buccaneers and pirates to hide out in friendly territory yet be close to foreign ships they could plunder.

The name "Tortuga" comes from the Spanish word for tortoise, bestowed due to the island's shape resembling that of a tortoise's shell. I just like the name because it sounds cool and rolls of the tongue pleasantly. I suspect that's at least partly why it's so popular in pirate fiction.