1 {scene: Ishmael's college dorm room.}
1 [sound]: Knock! Knock!
2 Ishmael: {opening the door} The Martians!
2 Martian 1: Step aside, elite Earthling combat warrior. We're armed.
3 Ishmael: I told you on the phone: I can't help you access Earth's defence systems!
4 Martian 1: Your moral fortitude is admirable - however, ultimately useless against our superior intellects and technology.
5 Martian 1: Bring forth the coercion device!
6 Ishmael: Oh gods! What is it? A drug that renders the human mind incapable of deception and turns us into suggestible automatons?
7 Ishmael: A mind probe of such fiendish cunning as to be able to rip a man's deepest, darkest secrets directly from his neurons?
8 Martian 1: Chocolate brownies. Will you please help us?
8 Ishmael: Ooooh! Yes!!

Mmm... chocolate brownies.

Chocolate brownies are not things that I grew up with. My mother never made them. In fact, I dare say almost no Australian mothers made them when I was growing up. I didn't even know what a brownie actually was until I was maybe 20 years old and visited the USA for the first time. I'd heard about them from American TV shows, but they were basically some mysterious thing that American mothers baked for their kids on TV shows - not something that Australian kids were familiar with.

The void in Aussie kids' diet left by lack of brownies was filled by chocolate crackles. Not terribly similar, except for the chocolateyness, but at least as delicious.

I have since acquired a chocolate brownie recipe and bake them myself occasionally. I like to underbake them a bit, leaving the inside all gooey, and eat them hot out of the oven with vanilla ice cream. Mmmm.

I'd betray the Earth for some right now.

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2017-03-15 Rerun commentary: Wow, Ishmael's computer must be a pretty old model here.

The Martians have to hold the guns with the grips horizontal, because their arms don't have hands that can rotate like human minifigures.

Oh, and brownies are now common in cafes and supermarkets here, whereas chocolate crackles seem to have retreated in popularity. Another unfortunate victim of the unstoppable creeping imperialism of American culture.