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1 SFX: Knock! Knock!
2 Martian 2: Here's your cat back.
3 Ishmael: You're handing him back just like that? I thought you were going to do unspeakable things to stop him foiling your conquest of Earth! What happened?
4 Martian 2: We tried probing him. Our leader's arms will be in bandages for about 3 weeks.
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I've owned two cats. The first we bathed occasionally. She didn't like the experience, but she put up with it, standing there in the bathtub looking undignified and disgusted.
When I got my second cat, I decided she could use an occasional bath as well. So one day I tried to give her one. "How hard could it be?" I thought.
Never. Again.
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