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1 Armoured knight: Alack! Yon pigeon-livered dragon hath disgorgest deceitful devils!
2 Mercutio: Wow. Do people really speak like that?
3 Shakespeare: Hmmm. Wait a minute. This is 1536. Nobody dresses in armour like this any more.
4 Armoured knight: Thou hath discernst mine artifice. I’m in costume to go to the local Medieval Faire.
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I'm sure I've mangled the attempt at Middle English verb endings. But that's fine, because the "knight" isn't really speaking Middle English! He's just putting it on as part of his Medieval act.
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