1 Hermione: No, Professor Dumbledore! It's Cthulhu! I read about him in Unaussprechlichen Kulten.
2 Dumbledore: Miss Granger, that's a very dangerous book from the Highly Restricted Section of the library...
3 Hermione: I wouldn't talk, Professor. Exactly who hired this new Professor Steve?
4 Dumbledore: Has anyone ever told you that you're one devious little witch?

Unaussprechlichen Kulten is the pseudo-German name of the book first described as Nameless Cults by Robert E. Howard in one of his Cthulhu mythos stories. H. P. Lovecraft tried to translate it into German, and August Derleth came up with the name Unaussprechlichen Kulten - however this translates more literally as "Unpronouncable Cults".

Oh, and if you think Irregular Webcomic doesn't have to stay PG-rated, you could replace the first letter of Dumbledore's last word with something else, if you like.

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Tom from Germany writes to tell me that the thing that has Germans rolling on the floor laughing whenever they play Call of Cthulhu is that Derleth also got the pluralisation of "Kult" wrong, and hence the declination of "unaussprechlich" as well. To be grammatically correct the title should really be Unaussprechliche Kulte.

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2013-09-03 Rerun commentary: Unless, of course, August Derleth knew something hideous about the squamously Stygian German language and its loathsomely miasmic origins that native German speakers of today keep suppressed in the darkest, most sepulchral parts of their racial memory, lest it drag them screaming into repellent nightmares rugose with yammering mucilaginous forms beyond their most fevered imaginations...

In which case, the joke is on them.