1 Head Death: AH, MY NEW COLLECTOR. SIT DOWN.
2 Charity Collector Guy: Sorry I took so long getting here.
3 Head Death: DID THE PICKET LINE DELAY YOU?
4 Charity Collector Guy: No. Do you know how hard it is for a mortal to find a place with no directions other than "in the middle of an infinite featureless plane"?

I've had a few interesting reader feedback messages from this one.

Some argue that an infinite plane cannot have any centre, as there are no edges from which to measure distances to establish a centre.

Others argue that every point on an infinite plane is a centre, because there is an equal amount of plane on any side (i.e. an infinite amount).

What nobody seems to have realised is that we clearly have a situation in which there is exactly one well-defined centre. The centre of this infinite plane is where the Head Death's desk is. Q.E.D.

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2014-09-08 Rerun commentary: Technically, it would have been infinitely difficult for the Charity Collector Guy to find the right spot, and he never would have arrived in any finite amount of time.

But this, being fiction (and to paraphrase Terry Pratchett), allows events with infinity-to-one odds to happen nine times out of ten.